Yesterday was Valentine’s Day 2011. At TheDOJO our words of the week were Confucius said, “Love”. Some of our discussions with the children, parents & adult students included HOW to love & HOW to become a whole human being capable of expressing love towards others sustainably. 3 ideas about love were taught.
Idea number one. Becoming a whole human being. It has been said that in a loving relationship two people are a half circle coming together to make a complete circle. Let’s evolve this idea to a higher level. What if each person was a whole circle, a whole human being. Rather than being dependent on the other for completion, as a whole independent circle the two can come together & overlap forming a third circle as if 1+1=3. They interdependently create something that was not there before. A loving relationship based on trust & trust worthiness, temperance, conviction a virtue of unconditional love. This is not to be confused with infatuation, a vice & common feeling mistakenly thought to be love but is not.
Idea number two. What constitutes a whole human being? We taught the children that self-love is just as important as outwardly expressing love to someone else. A healthy environment inside ones own mind & heart can create or attract a healthy loving relationship with another on the outside such as with a spouse, family member or friend. Self-respect, self-worth, self-discipline, self-esteem, self-control, self-confidence all cultivate self-love. A person who loves themselves too much or too little will not be able to serve another in a loving way sustainably, therefore a balance in self-love should be reached.
Idea number three. Love is a verb. It’s Hollywood & commercial holidays such as Valentine’s Day that teaches that Love is a Noun. We get Love the noun by performing Love the verb. In other words to love someone is through action, to treat them with respect, honor them, be trustworthy & affirm their worth & potential.
Children as young as 4 years old picked up very quickly this introduction to Love. Although incomplete this discussion inspired intelligent thought & to use one’s mind in a form of self awareness. Practice & pondering deeply one can explore love in a healthy & sustainable way.